A Start-Up's Demise In Eight Steps

Working for the man can be a thankless grind. Now with the economy shedding jobs, more pink-slippers may try their hands at going it alone. Entrepreneurship can be liberating, but no matter what business you choose, success takes heaps of forethought, tenacity and attention to detail. In other words, all the stuff that Donny Don't--the fictional, fumbling hero in the following slide show--doesn't have.

Taking the Plunge

Donny Don't can't stand his 9-to-5 job. His bosses are overbearing, his commute interminable, his work mind-numbing and his paycheck paltry. To top it off, he gets consistently slammed in performance reviews. Fed up, he decides to take the plunge and peddle his own brand of funny T-shirts. Everybody loves funny T-shirts, especially the people Donny spends time with on weekends at the beach, and who all tend to laugh at his jokes. How hard could it be?

Finding a Backer

Capital is all too scarce for a lot of start-ups. Fortunately, Donny finds an angel--in the form of his loving and supportive cousin Danny Do, a partner at a white-shoe law firm--who agrees (despite his thinly veiled reservations) to invest in the new T-shirt venture. With that kind of benevolent backing, success was all but guaranteed, Donny thought.

Designing the Product

After buying a round of drinks for all his T-shirt-wearing buddies to toast his new venture, Donny summons his muse. His knockout design idea: "Homer Simpson for President." He shows a sketch to his cousin, whose closet is wall-to-wall Brooks Brothers. "What do I know about fashion?" says Danny. "Go for it!"

Choosing a Supplier

Flushed with excitement, Donny picks the first printing company he can find--one that happens to charge 30% more while also offering stingier credit terms than competing suppliers do--and orders his first batch. (Danny doesn't object, as he is up to his neck in a string of small-business bankruptcy cases triggered by the spreading credit crisis.)

Picking a Distribution Channel

When the T-shirts arrive, Donny hits the streets with a gusto he never had for his day job. His strategy: Set up a table in a crowded shopping district and watch the cash pour in. Fifteen minutes later, the skies open, and the rain causes the cheap ink on his samples to run. ("Maybe I should have done more research on that printing company," he thinks.) Another 15 minutes later, the police show up asking to see Donny's selling permit, which of course he doesn't have. Undaunted, Donny decides to sell his T-shirts online (a strategy made even more appealing by the theoretical opportunity to spend most of the working day in pajamas).

Buying Health Insurance

While Donny's mad dash in the rain didn't claim much inventory, it did leave him with a nasty cold, which soon blossoms into walking pneumonia. Too bad Donny doesn't have health insurance. Cousin Danny, now visibly irked, swoops to the rescue and covers the medical bills.

Crafting a Marketing Strategy

Fairly handy with computers, Donny downloads a free Web site design program and builds a few pages, on which he sticks his personal e-mail and cellphone number so customers can contact him. Soon enough, e-mail telemarketers begin swarming, as do the spammers, but there's no money in the budget for a receptionist. When Danny gets wind of all this, he asks Donny, "What's your marketing strategy?" Donny's reply: "What do you mean? These shirts should sell themselves--they're hilarious!"

Going Bust

Now weeks behind on his rent, Donny finds an eviction notice waiting for him when he gets back from his last summer beach weekend (to afford it, he loaded up his credit card, which carries a 21% interest rate). He tries to call Danny, but the phone company, to whom he also owes money, has shut off his service. Had he been able to check his messages, he would have found three from the T-shirt supplier's collection agency.

Epilogue

A week later, Donny's entrepreneurial gig is up. "I'm not supporting you anymore," Danny tells him in his own living room, where his homeless cousin is now decamped. "I found you an assistant's job at the law firm."

"Is it cool if I wear my T-shirt to work?" asks Donny.

"Sure," says Danny. "Just wear a dress shirt so no one can see the stupid thing."

from: Forbes

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